My Experience Supporting At-Risk Kids
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June 22, 2022I’ve said before, and I’ll say again: If leftists put their money where their mouths are and actually spent time working with the youth they claim to be so concerned about, they would abandon their progressive principles in a heartbeat. Because they are actively harming youth.
How do I know? Because I’ve spent two and a half years working with at-risk kids in an impoverished neighborhood. I’ve written before about the negative effect BLM and its rhetoric has had on these kids, but today I want to talk more about the LGBTQ issue. Daisy just wrote about some troubling activities by pro-alphabet people teachers, and it made me reflect on my own experiences dealing with young teens who are questioning their own identities– often with parents who they cannot count on to be supportive no matter what.
I’ve had a young lady confide in me that she thinks she’s trans. You’re not, I thought in the moment, but I didn’t say so. I asked her why she felt that way. I asked her what she thought would change. I asked her what name she’d choose. And I told her, in no uncertain terms, that I will be there for her no matter what.
I’ve watched a young man grow and blossom from a little baby 6th grader into a teenager who is a self-professed bisexual, but in my humble opinion will come to find he is gay. When he expressed interest in a girl, I asked him what he liked about her. When he said he was maybe interested in boys, I said, cool. I told him more days than not, I will be there for him no matter what.
I’ve known a young man who’s known he’s gay longer than I’ve known him. I’ve been supportive as he prepared to come out to his parents. I remind him every chance I get that he is a unique, worthy, wonderful individual, and that I will be there for him no matter what.
The one thing I never did, or even thought about doing, was to insert myself between the individual teen and their family. I know for some of these kids, their families will not be welcoming. I know that some kids that have come through my program will be rejected by their parents because of their sexual orientation. But never did I ever place myself between the individual and those parents.
That’s what I don’t get about this chic brand of pro-LGBTQ teachers: You can support these kids without even touching, let alone disrupting, their family dynamic. I want to believe that the teachers spotlighted by accounts like Libs of Tiktok really only care about their students’ wellbeing, but they way they talk about it, I just cannot come to that conclusion.
Why not? Because, time after time after time, these teachers address issues of sexual orientation and gender identity in the most self-serving of ways.
Take, for example, this trans teacher who describes coming out to his/her four- and five-year old students as “one of the biggest moments in my transition” (emphasis added):
Or this teacher talking about, and reiterating, her gay agenda:
Or, sh*t, whatever this is:
I could keep going, but I think you get my point: This current wave of pro-LGBTQ teacher are far more interested in their own personal validation than the well-being of their students.
And that’s what’s wrong with this current movement– even within the context of teachers ostensibly supporting their at risk kids, like so:
If you really care about a vulnerable young person’s well-being, you do NOT step between them and their family. Even if you believe they are not healthy for the kid to be around, you leave that up to them. Because no teacher, coach, or auxiliary adult knows the specifics of the dynamic a child has with their parents. It is not our place to step between what should be, and usually is, the most sacred and developed relationship a child has with an adult. Even when you think you know they need to step away.
My job, a teacher’s job, is not– no one’s job is– to replace a child’s parent. The only role of these auxiliary adults in kids’ lives is to support them in the pursuit of a healthy life. And in the instance that that mission is at odds with the parents’ prerogative– and I’ve seen those situations myself!– it is not our place to separate the kid from their family. All we should do, and can do, is to remind them as often as possible that they are loved, they are special, and we are there for them. If the child decides on their own to break with their parent(s), they can count on you.
It’s not a hard line to walk, really. It’s as easy as saying, “You are loved, and I am here for you.” It takes MORE work to step between a child and their parents. And THAT is what’s wrong with these progressive teachers: They care more about themselves and their agenda than the kids they claim to serve.
I’m not a parent. I’m not even a teacher. But I have spent a lot of time with a lot of kids who need a lot of extra love, and I know it’s doing them no favors to sabotage their familial ties. So take it from me: Vulnerable kids need addition, not subtraction or division. Give them love. Don’t make them question whatever they already have.
1 Comment
This is a great article, and SO true! Thank you Rachel. I, too, have spent a lot of time working with at risk youth and it’s important to note that the teen years are a particularly fraught season in terms of family relationships. Their relationship with their parents may be strained and they may feel not supported, which is why it’s so important to have other trusted adults in their lives. BUT….the family unit remains at the core and I’ve seen some of these kids who were so alienated from their parents end up with very close loving relationships as young adults. Really, at the end of the day, when you’re working with kids/youth in ANY capacity the key is that it’s ALWAYS about them and NEVER about you.