Columbia University’s Marching Band ‘Will Not Continue To Exist In Any Capacity’

After 116 years, and allegedly questionable actions on their part, Columbia University’s marching band has officially been disbanded. According to the university, the marching band had been “founded on the basis of racism, cultural oppression, misogyny, and sexual harassment.”

Reportedly, the university had already defunded the marching band and prohibited the band from performing at any athletic events.

The band had already been defunded by the university and prohibited from performing at official athletic events. pic.twitter.com/9XFjppUfau

— Anthony Zurcher (@awzurcher) September 15, 2020

Sheesh, I remember when I was in high school, the band kids were the teddy bears of the school, alongside the drama students. I know that doesn’t mean much, but I grew up thinking it was such a wholesome kind of group.

I’m genuinely curious what on God’s green earth these students could have done to cease the existence of the marching band in its entirety. Were their uniforms fascist? Perhaps their formations were intimidating? Did they beat their drums in a sexually suggestive manner?

Oh wait –

Actually, the statement says they’re hoping for a exactly that. pic.twitter.com/H0D67zMeMX

— DemocracyInPeril🌻 (@TruckeePine) September 15, 2020

Ohhhh, I’m starting to see what the true motive is here. I didn’t even have to dig… or, scroll… very far to find this gem.

But, if you do more digging/scrolling, apparently the band members have been D-Bags for a long time?

I dunno, you look at the history of the "band", and it just sounds like a group of assholes being assholes. They've been assholes for a long time, too. This is from 1993. pic.twitter.com/e3j4jk9C1y

— afferent_input (@afferent_input) September 15, 2020

I’m interested to see how this one unfolds. I have some inklings, and I’m usually right on the money with my gut feelings, but I’ll humor the waiting.