He’s Coming He’s Coming He’s Coming He’s Coming He’s Coming
Gerard Butler Is Getting INSANE Hate On Tweets About His Decimated Malibu Home
November 12, 2018
Florida Recount Underway, Guess Who Hasn’t BEGUN Recounting
November 13, 2018So, nothing about this post is gonna be political, you guys. NOTHING. This is going to be a completely self-indulgent post that maybe like 2 people care about, and you can either bail now or you can just settle in and let me completely spaz out in front of you because
ROBBIE WILLIAMS IS COMING TO VEGAS AND NOTHING ELSE MATTERS RIGHT NOW AND I AM LOSING MY MIND WITH GLEE.
If you’ve followed this site or my previous site that no longer exists that I had waaaaaaaaaay back in the day, then you know I am Robbie Williams’ biggest fan. If you’re an American, the next most logical question for you right now is, “Who the hell is Robbie Williams?”
And that’s OK, because very very very few people in the United States have heard of him, even though on basically every other continent he is one of the most successful performing artists OF ALL SPACE AND TIME.
Don’t believe me? From his Wiki:
He is the best-selling British solo artist in the United Kingdom and the best selling non-Latino artist in Latin America. Six of his albums are among the top 100 biggest-selling albums in the United Kingdom–four albums in the top 60–and in 2006 he entered the Guinness Book of World Records for selling 1.6 million tickets of his Close Encounters Tour in a single day. His records sales stands at over 77 million worldwide, making him one of the best-selling artists of all time.
Anyway, my point is that he is a HUGE DEAL and if you’re not a fan of his you’re seriously missing out.
But here’s the thing. He’s pretty much unheard of in the US, which blows my mind completely because I’ve loved him since the late 90s, ever since I saw the music video of him ripping off his skin. (I know, it sounds gross, and it is, but I loved the song and I loved his looks and I loved his humor and that was the beginning of my celebrity crush.)
Because he’s unheard of in the US, I have dragged Mr. Mock to Europe TWICE to see him in concert – the first time in a giant stadium where our seats were in the nosebleed section in Stuttgart, Germany, and the 2nd time in Glasgow, Scotland, where we were basically standing in the very front right next to the stage and I SWEAR TO GOD ROBBIE AND I MADE EYE CONTACT and it was one of the best nights of my entire life. This is how close I was. HE IS TOTALLY LOOKING AT ME.
Anyway, I’ve just sort of resigned myself to the fact that if I ever want to see him in concert again, I have to leave the country to do it, because as I think I’ve made clear, NO ONE IN THE US KNOWS HIM.
Or, so I thought. Because yesterday, I was getting my hair colored, and I was scrolling through Instagram, and I SAW THIS AND NEARLY DIED.
If for some reason that doesn’t appear for you, here you go.
You guys, my brain exploded when I saw that. Like – I had to do a mental welfare check ON MYSELF, to make sure that I hadn’t all of a sudden lost track of time and space because I genuinely thought this had to be some sort of elaborate April Fools’ joke or something, and then I realized it’s November, and IT WAS REAL.
I immediately texted Mr. Mock and Daisy and to the extent that you can scream over text, I screamed my bloody head off. I’m sure if I could have seen either one of their faces in that moment, they would have been rolling their eyes all over the place. Mr. Mock has grown to appreciate Robbie’s music and has enjoyed his concerts, but Daisy remains unconvinced. And I think she is slightly resentful that he takes up so much space in our office (courtesy of my sister).
He’s coming for a mini-residency, you guys. At my favorite hotel in Vegas. OBVIOUSLY, I’m going to one of the shows. I don’t know which one yet, but I will be doing anything I can do to make sure I am in the very front row, and I will be buying whatever VIP package is available that lets me finally meet him and get a photo with him, because HE IS COMING TO AMERICA AND I CANNOT BELIEVE IT AND I AM SO EXCITED I CAN BARELY BREATHE.
You know what this means? It means if the 6-day mini-residency does well, it’ll turn into a full blown residency and I will go see him like 3 more times this year. And you know why that’s OK? Because I am turning 50 in 2019 and that means all of this is totally meant to be for my birthday. Don’t you think? I MEAN WHAT ARE THE CHANCES that he’d plan this during the year I’m turning 50? At my favorite hotel in one of my favorite cities? WHAT ARE THE CHANCES, I ASK YOU.
Anyway, this is happening, it’s basically the greatest news in the history of news, and you are better for knowing it. You’re welcome.
