Today, In Florida News: Woman Gouged Her Mother’s Eyeballs Out With Glass Shards

Aaahhhh Florida.

Known for beautiful weather, sandy beaches, and WEIRD AS ALL F**K news.

Seriously, folks. Whenever I read a headline like: ‘I’m a murderer!’: Florida woman ‘gouged her mother’s eyeballs out with glass shards and stored them in a cardboard box’ my immediate thought is “Hmm. Probably Florida.”

There’s like a 50/50 chance.

I often ask Hannah wtf is up with her home state. Her response is usually something like “Oh. That’s south Florida. I live in NORTH Florida.”

Whatever, Hannah. You live really close to Jacksonville, and a bunch of weird a$$ sh*t (for lack of a better term, really) goes down there, too.

Anyway, yeah… this story just SCREAMS Florida. (And is gross as all get out.)

According to the Daily Mail:

A Florida woman gouged her mother’s eyeballs out with glass shards and stored them in a cardboard box during a drug-induced attack, according to authorities.

Camille Balla, 32, is facing a first-degree murder charge after she was found covered in blood and sitting on the sidewalk by her Royal Palm Beach home on Friday.

‘I killed my mother and I need help,’ a frantic Balla told officials when they arrived at the home she shared with her mother, before handing them a blood-soaked set of keys.

OOOOOOOMG. This sounds like some horror movie business.

A blood trail that started in the living room lead police to the house’s garage, where they found the body of 55-year-old Francisca Monterio-Balla among broken glass and pools of blood.

Her eyeballs had been ‘removed from her head and placed on a nearby cardboard box’ and she had cuts all over her body, per the police report cited by NBC 5.

Handwritten notes with religious messages about clearing the soul were also found in the garage.

According to Balla’s statements to fire rescue officials, she had smoked marijuana that she believed was laced with Flakka or PCP.

UGHHH.

If ever there’s been a “don’t do drugs, kids!” moment… this is it.

‘I’m a murderer, I’m a murderer!’ Balla yelled as she ran around and then fell on the ground, according to the police report.

Police were called when one of Balla’s co-workers went to the home after Balla called them saying she might have killed her mother.

Balla was treated for cuts on her hands and knees at Palms West Hospital and then taken to St Mary’s Medical Center when she started screaming again.

During her court appearance on Monday morning she began screaming again and had to be removed from the hearing. The judge then ordered her to have a mental evaluation.

A substance found at the home believed to be marijuana has been sent to a lab for testing.

Yeeeeah… that’s not just marijuana we’re dealing with here.

Horrific.