Think Before You Tat. That’s All I’m Saying.

According to this, a fellow by the name of Jeffrey Chapman is about to go on trial for first degree murder in Kansas.  He's accused of killing another dude by the name of Damon Galliart, whose body was discovered by hunters in a ditch southwest of Great Bend.

Here's what Jeffrey looks like:

You might notice the giant tattoo on his throat which screams (in mirror image), "MURDER."

Jeffrey's defense attorney has filed an official motion with the courts asking that Jeffrey's tattoo not be seen or mentioned during the trial, and he's even asking for a professional tattoo artist to remove the tattoo. That, presumably, would be paid for by taxpayers. Someone correct me on that if I'm wrong.

The motion says, "Mr. Chapman's tattoos are not relevant to any material facts and Mr. Chapman asks for the court to exclude any mention of his tattoos at trial and further be allowed to cover them up in an appropriate manner.  The fact that he has 'Murder' tattooed across his neck is irrelevant to the State's case and extremely prejudicial to Mr. Chapman if introduced at trial or observed by the jury."

Is it just me, or does that sound just hilariously defensive?  It's not like anyone forced Jeffrey to get one of the world's dumbest tattoos and then go murder someone, for crying out loud (or allegedly murder someone, anyway).

But here's the problem, in Kansas, tattoo artists can ONLY practice in licensed facilities which have been cleared by the Kansas Board of Cosmetology.  And the sheriff opposes any request to transport Jeffrey to a licensed tattoo facility. Which means that Jeffrey's big giant MURDER tattoo is likely here to stay.

It's as if Jeffrey's defense attorney has never heard of turtlenecks.  Or scarves.  In fact, I think it would be awesome if Jeffrey wore a turtleneck and an ascot to trial. Maybe with a nice floral pattern, even.

Let Jeffrey be a lesson to all of us.  If you're going to get a tattoo, consider getting one that doesn't spell out the name of a crime you might later be accused of committing.

Just a handy public service announcement from the Chicks.

You're welcome!