The “Speedway Slammer” is Coming to a Midwestern State Near You

Indiana will soon become home to the “Speedway Slammer,” a detention center for illegal immigrants, much like the infamous “Alligator Alcatraz” in Florida. My guess is with a catchy name like that we have a 95% chance of merch coming available. T-shirts, anyone?  

CBS News reports:

The Trump administration will build a new immigration detention center in Miami County, Indiana, already nicknamed the “Speedway Slammer” — but not everyone is happy about the moniker.

Trump administration officials boasted about the new state partnership, saying the facility will be the next so-called “Alligator Alcatraz.” It will be built about 75 miles from Indianapolis and the actual Indiana Speedway.

Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem trumpeted the deal late Tuesday, saying Indiana would add 1,000 detention beds for immigrants facing deportation under a revived federal program.

On social media, DHS also posted an altered image of a race car emblazoned with “ICE,” short for Immigration and Customs Enforcement. The IndyCar-style vehicle is shown rolling past a barbed-wire prison wall.

“If you are in America illegally, you could find yourself in Indiana’s Speedway Slammer,” Noem said, likening it to the controversial facility built in the Florida Everglades. She added the new partnership will “help remove the worst of the worst out of our country.”

Border czar Tom Homan said the goal of the facility is to allow ICE to make more arrests and have more beds to detain people in.

“With us hiring at a massive rate, there are more boots on the ground meaning more arresting more criminals, which means we need more beds,” Homan said.

The project doesn’t involve construction; instead, federal funds will be used for space at the Miami Correctional Facility in Bunker Hill. The Indiana Department of Corrections said, which has a total capacity of 3,100 bed, 1,200 of which are not currently filled.

Waste not, want not. As a taxpayer, I’m glad they will be utilizing the existing resources for the detention center instead of building something new.

But as you would expect, not everyone is pumped about the announcement.

The article continues:

The outlandish name quickly drew backlash, notably from the town of Speedway, an Indianapolis suburb which is home to the iconic racetrack that hosts the Indianapolis 500.

“This designation was developed and released independently by the federal agency, without the Town’s involvement or prior notice regarding the use of the name ‘Speedway,'” officials with the Indiana town of roughly 14,000 said in a statement. “Our primary focus remains the well-being of our residents, businesses, and visitors.”

IndyCar officials were also caught off guard.

“We were unaware of plans to incorporate our imagery as part of announcement,” IndyCar said, asking that its intellectual property “not be utilized moving forward in relation to this matter.”

The altered image used by DHS featured an IndyCar with the No. 5, the same number as the only Mexican driver in the series.

DHS officials were undeterred by the pushback, saying Wednesday they would continue promoting the plan with the name.

“An AI generated image of a car with ‘ICE’ on the side does not violate anyone’s intellectual property rights,” DHS said in a statement. “Any suggestion to the contrary is absurd.”

Call it the Speedway Slammer or the Hoosier Hoosegow for all I care—the name doesn’t matter. What matters is the fact that hordes of people have entered the country illegally, and as a result, we need detention centers to house them before they are sent home.

The controversy shouldn’t be over a cheeky name; it should be over our laws being broken so blatantly. But if we’re going to lean into the racecar branding as the facility is being built, I’ll leave you with my thoughts via Kevin James: