Are You An Annoying Fireworks Neighbor?
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July 6, 2022
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July 6, 2022People are already super mad at me and Daisy for our potty-mouths this morning, so I figured I might as well throw some gasoline onto the fire and talk about fireworks.
I’ve never been a person who enjoys lighting and/or setting off fireworks. Just not my thing. If it’s your thing, that’s your prerogative, of course. And I’m ALL ABOUT people celebrating Independence Day. I love giant fireworks displays – the kind that are huge but controlled, set off by adults, and a total spectacle on the night of the fourth of July. It used to be that those were really the only kind I ever saw, so they were special. They made the holiday that much more awesome.
Fast forward to present day, and now any rando can walk into a store and buy a bunch of fireworks to set off in their own backyards. Even though I think it’s idiotic and stupid and dangerous, I can appreciate that some families have that tradition for Independence Day.
What I cannot STAND, however, is that it’s no longer about July 4th. It’s about the two weeks preceding and two weeks after July 4th. It’s about endless, exhausting, dog-scaring, baby-startling explosions shaking the walls of your own home because you have a$$hole neighbors who care only about their own gratification and have no respect for what it means to be neighborly.
If you’re that person – the neighbor who lights off fireworks for days before and days after the 4th, you absolutely suck.
I sympathize with the folks who have babies that are scared out of their slumber. I sympathize with the folks who have terrified dogs they cannot console. It’s all so unnecessary and rude.
To be clear, if this was about one day per year? Awesome. Great. Have your fun. Light ’em up. It’s expected and tolerable when it’s one day, and when it’s to celebrate something as glorious as America. Just know that if you’re the person who extends the fourth of July into a weeks-long boom-fest, you’re a horrible selfish person with no regard for anyone else, and therefore, as I mentioned above, you suck.
On top of that, it sucks to know that every July, invariably, we’ll have to read articles like this one, describing how an 11 year old boy right here in my home state of IN died while playing with fireworks.
From the source:
“I held my son’s broken skull and brain in my hands last night,’ his mother Kyrra Lynn, wrote on Facebook. ‘That’s the reality. Don’t even f*****g buy those damn things! I’ll never see my son again over a f*****g firework. Don’t ever think it can’t happen to yours. Seriously.’
Also according to the source, nine people died last year due to fireworks, along with another 11,500 who were seriously injured.
I have no idea, nor does the source article provide detail about whether parents were supervising the 11 year old boy who is now dead because of this idiotic form of entertainment. I would hope that supervision over kids that young handling fireworks would be a given, but who knows. All I know is that his mom is grieving now, and is filled with regret.
Anyway, that’s my vent o’ the day. Official firework shows on the 4th are awesome. Neighborhood fireworks on the 4th are tolerable. Anything beyond that? You suck. You can @ me all you want.
UPDATED because I had to include this perfect demonstration of why this is so monumentally stupid on every level. 🙂
7 Comments
Somewhat related, but here in Michigan, people would fire guns at exactly midnight on New Year’s Day until 12:01 a.m. then it was over and done with. Nowadays, particularly in inner city Detroit, it continues until the break of dawn, (or longer). Dave Rexroth, a Detroit area weather anchor, lost an eye in a fireworks accident about ten years ago. Yes, it is annoying when people set off fireworks when some are trying to get some sleep or at odd hours, in the name of celebrating freedom. Here’s some fireworks:🎆🎇✨🎆🎇✨🎆🎇✨🎆🎇✨
Let’s make a law that says fireworks can only be set off between the hours of 8:30 pm till 9;45 pm on July 4th only and make it a felony to set off fireworks any other time. We can throw in jail time and extra heavy fines for anyone that wants to celebrate freedom and liberty in the unauthorized time frame. Thank you, the liberal world order.
Not to sound heartless, but unless you are part of the family of one of those 9, who cares? It’s nine. There were probably more people who accidentally inhaled cinnamon, sneezed, cracked their melon on a cupboard, and died.
Also, exploding stuff is fun. Set off fireworks every day if you want (but I live several hundred feet from my nearest neighbor).
I disagree. As conservatives we espouse things like ‘in your home, on your property, go ahead as long as it isn’t infringing on anyone else.’ Well, shooting off fireworks, regardless of where they are shot off from, does affect other people. Lighting a sparkler or two in your backyard? Go crazy, those don’t affect anyone. But no, I don’t think people should have the permission to set off five inch mortars any day of the year.
We, as a country, have been setting off fireworks on the 4th since 1777. Do you think Ben Franklin wrote letter whining about his neighbors being too noisy celebrating freedom and liberty? Go stick your head back up your a**, *ickweed!
What the actual eff is wrong with you? Do you understand the difference between saying something is f*cking rude and calling for that thing to be illegal?
GTFO
Not exactly, but let’s go with it. If your neighbor works nights, when are you “allowed” to mow your grass? If your neighbor is a militant vegan, can you grill a delicious piece of cow in your back yard?