Psaki: Harris Didn’t Follow Mask Rules Because It Was “Emotional” And “Historic” Day

Ok, stick with me here, because I’m about to walk you through some serious mental gymnastics. But I think it’s important to be really honest about how truly serious and incredibly intelligent the Covid virus really is. Because VP Harris has been taking a lot of heat for not wearing a mask indoors at the KBJ confirmation, despite having been exposed to Covid-19. I mean, Psaki initially claimed that Harris wore a mask inside, but video posted by the President himself showed that she, in fact, did not. So let’s get into it.

The CDC recommended certain masking guidelines (which changed frequently) that were then forced indiscriminately and illogically on the American people at both the federal and local levels. Presumably, this was for our own protection against an incredibly deadly virus that most people have almost 100% chance of surviving. And for which most people have natural immunity due to catching and recovering from the virus. And, you see, the virus molecules are so small that they can actually still permeate the average mask, which is likely being improperly worn anyway because the average American has not been trained in proper Personal Protective Equipment guidelines for wearing, handling, and disposing of contaminated masks. I mean, you could always try just holding your breath like Mayor Eric Garcetti did because he explained that means he has a “zero percent chance” of catching Covid. Oh, and we have several vaccines that are totally safe and effective, despite the fact that they actually aren’t at all as effective as we were promised they were, and also people keep getting diagnosed with or “dying suddenly” from strange and unexplainable health issues with absolutely no common link at all that anyone can fine. Except, of course, that they all seem to have made the right choice to get the Fauci ouchie, which is so good for them because it would have definitely been worse for them if they hadn’t, or so they say. And don’t forget that we have multiple treatment options for people sick with this virus, if they get symptoms beyond a cold. In fact, some of these treatments are so effective that the government had to step in and restrict local hospitals’ ability to obtain these treatments, and others were so cheap and safe that they had to be entirely banned from public use and discredited by “experts” after decades of data showing their safety and widespread usages. Just to keep people safe from them, of course. But really, if masks save even one life, right? That’s why the CDC recommends and federal and local governments enforce masking guidelines. It’s really for our own protection, you see. And, of course, based entirely on The Science.

Now, I’ve long marveled at the sheer brilliance of a virus that intuitively knows not to infect people when the are sitting down at a table in a crowded restaurant, but knows to infect the people who are walking to their tables in that same restaurant, thus necessitating a mask for the walk to the table part, but not the sitting, eating, talking, laughing part. Likewise, how brilliant that it knows not to infect people who are at a so-called “social justice protest,” or the funeral of a prominent Democrat, or getting their hair done in San Francisco, but definitely knows to infect people at a Trump rally, in a classroom of 5 year olds, or shopping at any small business across America, thus requiring mask and distancing rules for just those situations. And how special must Magic Johnson feel to know that the virus knows not to infect people who are next to him in crowded settings, like Mayors Garcetti and all those other high profile political and social elites at the Rams game, but definitely knows to infect the toddlers down the street at the daycares and elementary schools, thus requiring strict mask compliance by those kids, but not Magic and his pals. Honestly, such a smart and discerning virus.

Well, the virus has once again showed us just how incredibly brilliant it is. Covid-19 exposed Vice President Kamala Harris was seen without a mask during the indoor proceedings of the confirmation of Judge Jackson, in direct violation of the local CDC guidelines. So why did Kamala Harris feel so confident that she wouldn’t catch the deadly virus when she wasn’t complying with the CDC’s mask guidelines? Press Secretary Jen Psaki explained it for us.

.@PressSec Jen Psaki asked why VP Harris was seen maskless indoors, in violation of CDC guidelines:

“It was an emotional day, it was a historic day. And there were moments when she was not wearing a mask inside…but she was wearing it 99.9% of the time.” pic.twitter.com/fL0LPWHLuv

— Breaking911 (@Breaking911) April 11, 2022

Yep! It’s incredible. It was an emotional and historic day for Kamala Harris to watch the confirmation of the first black woman (wait, do we know yet if she really is a woman because she said she’s not a biologist and therefore can’t define what a woman is, so are we just taking her unqualified word for it…?), so the Covid virus apparently knew not to infect her on this emotional and historic day, so she didn’t need to wear her mask as recommended by the CDC. I mean, she apparently didn’t need to be super careful about it because it was an emotional and historic day, but she supposedly wore it most of the time, as Jen Psaki was careful to explain to the American public.

I guess now is as good a time as any to point out that THAT’S NOT HOW GERMS OR MASKS WORK. NONE OF THIS IS HOW GERMS AND MASKS WORK. NONE OF THIS IS ACTUALLY CONSISTENT WITH THE SCIENCE ABOUT GERMS OR MASKS. Then again, the science doesn’t actually matter to these people, or else they’d understand the science and abide by the science rather than setting arbitrary, illogical, and unscientific mask rules which they promptly violate because they recognize that the rules are just arbitrary, illogical, and unscientific.

Next time I get on a plane and they tell me I have to wear a mask, I’m just going to explain to them that it’s an emotional and historic day for me so I don’t actually have to wear one, because Jen Psaki explained to us how Kamala Harris exemplified this phenomenon about the Covid virus.

Also, I feel like every day is emotional and historic for school children. Think about it. Kids are overly emotional all the time, so every day is emotional at some point. And as for the historic part, they’re supposedly learning new things in school every day, right? So it’s historic every day. It’s a historic day of new understanding every day for these kids. So I guess school kids can take their masks off, too.