There’s A New Mental Illness Sweeping The Nation: #HSDS

TDS. You all know what it is. (Trump Derangement Syndrome, for the ONE of you who doesn’t.)

But I’m here to tell you there’s a new illness in town.

HSDS.

HOWARD SCHULTZ DERANGEMENT SYNDROME.

(COPYRIGHT ASHLEY D. I googled it. HSDS isn’t a thing yet. I’M HEREBY MAKING IT A THING.)

Anyway… let us examine some of the earliest victims:

Starbucks has supplied employees with a script of various ways to end any and all discussion about Howard Schultz https://t.co/efaiZBTQlo

— New York Magazine (@NYMag) January 31, 2019

If you’re heckling some 20-year old who makes coffee for a living about Howard Schultz running for president, you’re mentally ill.

I can’t wait to tax Howard Schultz back into the middle class.

— Ian Millhiser (@imillhiser) January 31, 2019

Yup. HSDS.

.@HowardSchultz isn’t ready for prime time. His knee-jerk rejection of a wealth tax shows why. We can’t end inequality until people like Howard & me are required to invest our fair share into our country. It’s not “punitive”—it’s patriotic.

— Tom Steyer (@TomSteyer) January 31, 2019

Howard Schultz grew up in the projects. He literally earned EVERY SINGLE PENNY of what he has. You hate him because he doesn’t think it’s cool that you want to take it away. HSDS.

Now… these folks are low on the spectrum. Let’s get into the NASTY stuff.

Fuck You Howard Schultz! Run as a dem! Support a dem. Or fuck the fuck off! #HowardSchultz

— Yo_TheOrangedog (@Yo_TheOrangedog) January 28, 2019

Anyone who could even consider mounting a third-party run in 2020 is an egomaniacal nightmare who needs to sit the fuck down if they give one single shit about this country and its future. https://t.co/Sc5w3K2pPf

— Melissa McEwan (@Shakestweetz) January 28, 2019

disclaimer: nobody should be nice to howard schultz. fuck that dude

— speechie mcpeachie (@kwentincanta) January 31, 2019

Heckler yells at Howard Schultz: “Don’t help elect Trump, you egotistical billionaire asshole!” pic.twitter.com/Fmlj7ng7HD

— Keith Boykin (@keithboykin) January 29, 2019

Yeah, but it would have that @HowardSchultz asshole shitting his pants! https://t.co/V6sKrDojxY

— Joanna 🇨🇦 🐔 🍷 (@joanvw09) January 31, 2019

Gargle my nuts you dumb old fuck

— stefan heck (@boring_as_heck) January 31, 2019

For the time being at least I have more followers than @HowardSchultz and I’m going to use that platform to say I wish he would FUCK OFF.

— Gary Whitta (@garywhitta) January 31, 2019

As a rule, I assume every billionaire is human sewage. Sure, might be exceptions, but not enough for me to give a shit. I look forward to the systematic political disembowelment of Howard Schultz. The candidate for assholes who prefer malice for the poor to be laced with Ambien.

— 🔥Aiden Wolfe (@AidenWolfe) January 31, 2019

…what is this dude even going on about?

If you’d asked me about Howard Schultz a week ago, I’d have said that as billionaire CEOs go, he didn’t seem that terrible, nor did Starbucks seem that terrible as giant corporations go. I now hate both and I always will.

— MDavid Klion (@DavidKlion) January 31, 2019

I just got the same press release in my inbox and apparently “TRENTA” stands for “Trump’s Re-Election? Not Today, Asshole”. So I immediately signed the petition. A+++ trolling https://t.co/2Cr5yb5MGi https://t.co/5wSP5CxQb1

— Adam Parkhomenko (@AdamParkhomenko) January 31, 2019

I had no idea who Howard Schultz was three days ago and now I hate his guts. That’s pretty impressive efficiency.

— Chris Jackson (@ChrisCJackson) January 29, 2019

I love, and by love I mean hate, how Schultz asks employees to refer to their billionaire boss by first name https://t.co/ZzOrgo18dm

— Casey Quinlan (@thatcaseyquin) January 31, 2019

…ok?

You know, i think one thing @HowardSchultz has done, is educate everyone how much easier & cheaper it is to make your own fucking cup of coffee than going to @Starbucks.

— Duncan Jones (@ManMadeMoon) January 31, 2019

And built an empire, but whatever.

I hate when people bully, like spreading opinion pieces using racial slurs or gender epithets to tens of thousands of followers. @HowardSchultz can’t run his twitter account for 72 hours without calling nasty insults thoughtful and thanking writers for denigrating women. pic.twitter.com/1KihuzhHJp

— Greg Feltes (@gregfeltes) January 31, 2019

NOOOOO! WAAAHHHH! HE RETWEETED AN ARTICLE WITH THE WORD “FAUXCAHONTAS” IN IT.

I’ve fallen into the very trap I’m bemoaning, but part of what I hate most about @HowardSchultz’s ego-circus is the attention it’s pulling from the impressive, viable candidates who are working to save us from four more years of the most unfit man to ever sit in the Oval Office.

— Pat Cunnane (@PatCunnane) January 31, 2019

Impressive viable candidates?

Name one.

I hate fucking #Starbucks now!#TraitorHowardSchultz

— Enough Is Enough (@VoteBlue50) January 31, 2019

I have to hand it to you. Pretty impressive to go from being unknown to having 75% of the country hate you in 4 days.

— Hayden Fry’s Mustache (@HFsMustache) January 30, 2019

ANYWAY

#HSDS…. let’s make it a thing.