I Defy You To Find A Weirder Headline Than The One I’m About To Show You.

My sister texted this to me and Marcus earlier today and I just HAD to share it with y’all.

(Side note:  If you’re new around here, and are unfamiliar with the awesomeness that is Marcus, please see here and here.)

No, I’m serious.  Go to those previous posts because you need a little Marcus in your life before you read the rest of this.

Did you read them?

Ok.  Good.

So, here’s the headline my sister sent us.

If your immediate reaction to that wasn’t, “TRIED WHAT OMG TRIED WHAT????!?!?!?! WHAT DID YOU TRY?!?” then I don’t even know.

I had to google that headline to see if it was Actually Real, and of course, it is.  It’s from a 2017 article on a website named Reductress, which, I’m happy to report, is completely satirical.

But wasn’t it fun, for that fleeting second, to imagine that it was a legit headline with a legit article and a legit woman behind it who’d legit tried to put her nipple into her own butthole?

You’re welcome.  And also I apologize.  Whichever fits.