Newsweek Ponders What The Upcoming Eclipse Means For Trump. Seriously.
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July 31, 2017This is not a drill. This is an ACTUAL HEADLINE from Newsweek. Like, for real.
Astrologers are freaking out about what the upcoming eclipse means for Trump https://t.co/lsTVWii3SI pic.twitter.com/QzbDVkFaww
— Newsweek (@Newsweek) July 30, 2017
Yeeeeeeeeeeeah, what?
Not that ANY of the content of this deranged pile of bull matters, but here’s a few of its most golden nuggets:
“There’s been a lot of conversation about this eclipse in terms of what’s going on with Donald Trump,” says Wade Caves, an astrological consultant who earlier in July published a 29-page analysis of the coming eclipse. “The astrological world has been completely buzzing with this for quite some time, even more so since Donald Trump was inaugurated.”
It gets even better…
The effects of the coming eclipse could take time to show up, according to astrologers’ claims. Caves believes the impact will appear over the next two years because the eclipse will take around two hours to cross the continent (for a solar eclipse, astrologers interpret each hour as a year). The result could be “a loss of a leader in some sense,” he says, whether literal or symbolic. “It seems to me very possible that by this time next year, we’re looking at the reality of Trump not being in office.”
In February, DeLeo-Moolenaar wrote on her blog Archetypal Assets that she finds it significant how the eclipse will involve Uranus, according to astrological charts. That planet, she wrote, “disrupts everything that it touches. It is a lightning bolt from the blue. Serious change in any direction and on a major scale.” And because Uranus “will make close aspects to Mr. Trump’s natal Mars,” she wrote, “this will be a power surge—provoking a crisis of some sort. Whether for good or evil, we can’t know in advance.”
BAHAHAHAHAHA WTF IS WRONG WITH THESE CLOWNS?
Ok seriously though, do these people really believe this crap? Or are they just getting paid for it?
If it’s the latter, I’d like to try my hand at this profitable business. AHEMMM! Here goes nothing! “Uranus and Venus will be intersecting over the Age of Aquarius. The moon is in the seventh house. Then, Jupiter aligns with Mars. Which means…. UNIMAGINABLE WEALTH! ….for me.”
How did I do?
