Men, do you hold doors open for women? Do you pay for dinner when you take a woman out on a first date? Do you offer her your coat if she’s cold?
You need to rethink your life. At least, according to Ashley Judd.
You see, basic etiquette and good manners can be offensive. Even if you don’t mean to offend, you probably are. Thank goodness Judd shared this extremely important article on good manners. Men need it.
A delightful and even important read, especially if you’d like a break from you know what & whom. https://t.co/eVzJKm8Iqi
— ashley judd (@AshleyJudd) July 29, 2017
(Yep. She’s still pulling the ridiculous “He who must not be named” crap.)
“Is a man sexist if he opens a door for a woman? Holds her chair? Orders her dinner?” https://t.co/4NmtWh9ivw
— Arianna Huffington (@ariannahuff) July 28, 2017
The article’s titled “Can Chivalry Be Anything Other Than Chauvinism in 2017?” It examines the complexity of good manners in 2017. You see, the basic chivalric code is rooted in inequality. Therefore, being kind and pleasant to women may actually be offensive, because you’re suggesting that they’re not equal to you and therefore in need of sympathy.
In modern society, operating from an outdated premise of inequality — even in the name of etiquette and good manners — could have the exact opposite effect. “Men who open doors for women are guilty of ‘benevolent sexism’ according to a new study by feminist psychologists,” the Daily Mail reported back in 2011. “Helping ladies choose the right computer as well as carrying their shopping are also signs of ‘unseen’ sexism in society, according to the report.”
Let me get this straight. Feminists don’t want men to act like gentlemen because it brings us back to a time when women weren’t equal. But according to feminists, women still aren’t equal, so which is it? Are we equal or are we not?
Feminism is confusing.
The rest of the article has people reacting to a number of various scenarios and determining what a man should do in each situation.
For example, one question read, “What’s the etiquette on holding a chair or opening the door for someone?” One individual replied, “I often think about the mixed messages we all receive about this. As a woman I love a man opening a door, etc. but then a part of me feels — why does he have to be the chivalrous one if we’re equal?”
Why are you asking such stupid questions? A man can hold a door open for a woman without some power hungry motive. I guarantee he’s not thinking, “I’m totally going to hold this door open for that lady, because I’m superior to her ’cause I’m a MAN and have loads of testosterone! She’s weak and pathetic! Therefore, I will exhibit my power by holding the door open!”
How stupid is that way of thinking?
Other questions included, “Should a man stand up when a woman leaves or returns to a dinner table?,” “Is it good etiquette to walk on the street side of a woman?” and “What about ordering food for a woman?”
I wasn’t aware that last one was A Thing.
You can read the answers here, but just know it’s a bunch of people analyzing stuff that really doesn’t need to be analyzed.
Generally, women want men to give them special treatment. We like to feel respected, admired and appreciated. If a guy pulls out a chair for me, my first thought isn’t, “OMG he thinks I’m a pathetic little weakling who’s incapable of pulling out my own chair!” It’s sweet and thoughtful. I like old school chivalry. It’s basically men treating women like prized possessions. You’d think feminists would like that.
Men, here’s the big takeaway: If Ashley Judd is ever behind you, please slam the door in her face just to be safe. You wouldn’t want to be sexist, after all.