If This Is What ‘Progressive Parenting’ Looks Like, I Want NOTHING TO DO WITH IT

I. Can’t. Even.

You know how there are some parents out there who are really into “progressive parenting”? “Progressive parenting” varies, but in most cases, it features 1.) Completely creepy hippie parents or 2.) Super “advanced” parents who think it’s appropriate to “teach” their young kids about things that they (the kids) are not prepared for.

Sure, telling your kid that they can be whatever gender they want is one thing, but this is disturbing in a different way.

The following video is completely uncomfortable and probably NSFW. It features parents teaching their YOUNG KIDS about masturbation. These innocent kids are sitting there like, “Huh?” Some of these parents even tell their kids about ADULT TOYS and encourage them to HOLD THEM FOR REAL.

[arve url=”https://www.youtube.com/embed/-0vPqxSVaG4?list=PLJic7bfGlo3pvlMXMebnPJBbnMiGjamb-“]

Look at their poor faces.

Just so you know, there’s a whole series of these types of videos, where parents explain consent, how they lost their virginity, birth control, how to deal with the police and so on.

It’s one thing to have “the talk” with your kids when they’re the appropriate age, but it’s another to have these conversations with kids who aren’t mentally prepared for it. Let your kids be kids. Don’t make them handle sex toys. (I cannot believe I just said that out loud.) They have the rest of their lives to get acquainted with adult crap.

Progressive parenting, you guys. It now involves teaching Barbie-wielding kids about masturbation. Someone get these poor kids some brain bleach, pronto.