“I’m Not Unhinged”: Axe-Wielding Man at McDonald’s Explains Why He Carries an Axe Around NYC

A couple weeks ago, a video went viral of a guy at a NYC McDonald’s smashing up the restaurant with an axe. In case you missed it, please enjoy:

The prevailing narrative was that the ax-man, Michael Palacios, lost his cool when a woman rejected him. But according to Palacios, the incident began when a security guard wouldn’t let him use the restaurant’s bathroom.

“I’m like, ‘Yo, bro, c’mon. Open the bathroom.’ And then I hear, ‘You, you don’t have to be mean about it.’ I’m like, ‘Shut the f–k up.’ I didn’t even look back. I just said it, and then it all became, ‘Oh, I’ll slap you.’ I’m like, ‘Where are you gonna slap me?’ And that’s when I came at the guy with the black tank top.

“And eventually I just got tired of three dudes backing me up, and I just slapped one of them. It had nothing to do with attacking women. The woman had no issues. I had no issues with the woman.”

But that’s not the interesting part of Palacios’s interview with the New York Post. The man’s unique genius is exemplified in his explanation for why he had an axe in the first place.

“Think about it. If you only think that the thing you can protect yourself with is a gun, we’re all going to go to f–king jail. With a hatchet, I have my options — throw it or just smash a f–king table. With a gun, all you do is shoot. I’m not unhinged.”

It’s an excellent point, especially in a town with such absurd, restrictive, unconstitutional gun laws. And, as Palacio rightly pointed out, a lot of crime.

“It’s New York City. I’ve been here for a long time, and there’s always been crime. I got hit in the head with a hammer at that corner like 10 years ago while I was walking to the store. Some random dude.

So, 10 years ago, somebody got hit with a hammer. Today, somebody hit a table with a f–king hatchet. I think things are getting better, if you ask me.”

I mean. . . the logic is airtight, y’all. I cannot fault the man. He made it very clear that he had no intention of hurting anyone, saying, “It’s not luck that [the other party] didn’t get chopped up. I didn’t chop them up because I didn’t want to.” And the footage supports that, I think. When you have a hatchet in one hand, but hit a guy with your other, empty hand, you’re probably not looking to inflict maximum carnage.

So why pull out an axe in the first place? Palacio explained,

“I wanted to intimidate them. Also, I wanted to show them that the hatchet was real. It’s not a toy. Nobody trains for this. The average person doesn’t train to fight off three people. I’m just lucky, I guess, that I drink enough water, and I do enough pushups to fend off three young adults. I’m just a regular guy. No military training.”

In fairness, I don’t think anyone saw that footage and thought, “This guy looks like a former Marine.” But I love that he chalked up his general physical wellness to drinking water.

I don’t know about y’all, but Palacio won me over with this interview. I would absolutely love the chance to sit down and have a drink with him.

Just maybe not at McDick’s.