Feminist Hag Lists The 18 Things Men Must Do In Order To Be More Feminist
THIS Is The America I Love – Roofers Stop Working To Respect Our Anthem
October 17, 2017Obese Woman Murders Child By Sitting On Her As Punishment
October 17, 2017Are you a man? Congrats! You already have one point against you. You’re naturally against women. You have an innate desire to oppress us. You’re born expecting us to make you sandwiches.
Check yourself.
That’s how feminists think. If you’re a dude who embraces your masculinity, you’re actively contributing the oppressive patriarchy. You are “The Man,” and not in a good way.
It’s OK though. There’s time to turn this around. First thing’s first. Order that RompHim, clip your hair back into a man bun and take Helen Rosner’s advice.
If you’re a man unsure of what to do to support women right now in your daily life (beyond, like, not sexually harassing us), some starting points:
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
1. Call dudes with penises women and find them attractive.
1. Overcome your own transphobia. Trans women are women. Accept the lived truth of NB and GNC people, whether or not they are women.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
2. Love abortion and actively work to advance the left’s baby murdering agenda.
2. Be pro-choice and be vocal in support of reproductive rights. (And generous! Give to @abortionfunds) Understand that the opposite of reproductive choice is forced childbearing.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
3. Start talking about periods all the time. And ask your employers if they provide free tampons for your female coworkers. They won’t think that’s creepy or weird at all.
3. Support subsidized birth control. Support nontaxed menstrual products. Ask your workplace if tampons and pads are free. Get over your embarrassment about menstruation.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
4. Fight for lactation spaces and free childcare in your spare time.
4. Vocally advocate at your workplace for longer and more egalitarian paid parental leave, whether or not parenthood is part of your life. Advocate for lactation spaces. Advocate for on-site or subsidized childcare.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
5. Allow “women’s issues” to consume your life. Fight for free bleeding all day every day.
5a. Actually prioritize women’s issues when you decide who to vote for. Understand that women’s issues are your issues.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
6. Never hang out with just “the guys,” ’cause that’s obviously sexist.
6. Whenever you are in a group of only men (social, work, church, etc.) ask yourself why. Then ask out loud why. Force an honest answer.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
7. Befriend #AllTheWomen.
7. Cultivate genuine, intimate, nonsexual friendships with women.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
8. Get rid of male heroes and get some freaking FEMALE mentors. ‘Cause Lord knows you probably don’t have any. You probably hate your own mother. Sexist.
8. Seek out women to be your heroes and mentors.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
9. Please be on the lookout for streets/buildings named after women just cuz.
9. Any time you see a building, street, institution, etc. named for a man, see how long it takes you to spot another one named for a woman.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
10. Try to get in touch with your feminine side. Try plucking your eyebrows or something.
10. Ask yourself what you don’t do, for whatever reason, that you also think of as something women tend to do. (Sew? Send birthday cards? Care about skincare?) Try doing it for a while.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
11. Pretty much don’t talk ever. Realize the mere sound of your voice is oppressive and kinda triggering.
11. Talk less. In all spaces. At all times.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
12. Treat your guy friends like the women ’cause women are better.
12. When you need support, reach out to men as well as women. Create a culture of openness around yourself.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
13. Buy a women’s magazine and read it and enjoy it. Think about trying that girly juice cleanse.
13. Consume media marketed to women. Don’t perform your consumption.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
14. Find overweight women attractive.
14. Deprogram your beliefs about thinness being an optimal state of feminine beauty. Deprogram your beliefs that your desire matters.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
15. Put the porn away.
15. Jerk off without porn for a while.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
16. Realize you’re probably racist and stop being racist.
16. Learn about racism and intersectionality, and do everything you can to empower and amplify black women and nbwoc
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
17. Be nice to kids. Except the unborn. They don’t matter.
17. Befriend children.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
18. Basically, chop your junk off and put a skirt on.
18-infinity. Please add more! I’ve got to go do other things now.
— Helen Rosner (@hels) October 16, 2017
See? 18 EASY PEASY steps. That’s how you become a feminist ally. SO SIMPLE. I know you can’t wait to jump right in!
If you’re a man and do ANY of these things please just remove your testicles and turn them and your man card in, right now. Thanks 🙂 https://t.co/14iMxUPDpA
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
Yeah seriously.
If you’re a man looking for ways to support women right now, here are a few things you can do …
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
1. Don’t baby, coddle or pretend she needs safe spaces. That is annoying as Hell. Treat her as an equal, nothing more, nothing less.
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
2. Feed her bacon. Lots of bacon.
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
Don’t be afraid to give her chocolate covered bacon. Chicks love risks. Take them.
3. Make sure you have really good Bourbon on hand and none of that generic crap you can buy just anywhere. #SingleBarrelFourRoses
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
4. Put your own damn socks and underwear away.
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
5. Orgasms. Lots and lots of orgasms.
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
6. DO NOT try and relate to her as a woman. You are not a woman and pretending you care about vagina rights is disingenuous at best.
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
And kinda creepy, tbh.
7. Make her laugh. Tell her dirty jokes, laugh at her dirty jokes. Life is serious enough as it is.
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
8. Drive FAST. Real fast. And smile when she drives fast.
Real fast.
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
Also, compliment her muscle car. (Just me? OK.)
9. Take her shooting. And last but not least …
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
10. BE A MAN. If a woman tells you she wants a sensitive guy who cares about feelings she’s confused. Curse, spit, swear, and scratch. /end
— 🎃The🐰Foo👻 (@PolitiBunny) October 17, 2017
Bam.
So, basically, be a leftist.
Yeah, no.
I don’t roll with that “Unless you buy into all my liberal bullshit and are cool with icing infants, you hate the womyn” crap.
Here’s how it’s going to be.
We’re ignoring you because you’re just another prog sexism hustler.#caring https://t.co/w61qJrqGgg— Kurt Schlichter (@KurtSchlichter) October 16, 2017
Guys, we’re not allowed to like what we like or we’re bad or the feminists will be unhappy.
Leaving aside that feminists are always unhappy, any of you guys up to cede your preferences to a bunch of bitter gender studies grads?
Show of hands…
Me neither.
Helen, you’re outvoted. https://t.co/AuEhEgctwP— Kurt Schlichter (@KurtSchlichter) October 16, 2017
Boom pow.
Women don’t want girly men. And chances are, manly men don’t want whiny, perpetually offended feminists. In other words, all of this should work itself out.
