Nikki Haley Says All Social Media Users Should Be Verified by Their Names

The presidential hopeful with two first names, Nikki Haley, is prepared to be all up in your business if elected. During an appearance on Fox News, Nikki voiced her plans to force social media companies to verify all their users by name.

Hey Nikki, verify this.

Look, I get it, bots are an issue. But you know what is worse? Our government sticking their grubby little fingers in every aspect of our lives. Not only is it none of their business if I want my name on Facebook to be Turd Ferguson, but it is also MY CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT to be able to be Turd Ferguson.

FREEDOM OF SPEECH, BABAAAYYYY.

While I personally don’t use a pen name, I do think they should be allowed online. There is also the huge logistical mess that would come from trying to verify everyone.

So, in conclusion, not only is Nikki’s idea big government overreach, it’s also big stupid.

Thank you, and goodnight.