Do You Do Yoga? You Contribute To White Supremacy. Duh.

I really like doing yoga. I knowwww someone’s going to come at me with “that’s for crunchy hippies.”

No. I refuse to let liberals “own” things. I like gourmet coffee, and fine art, and yoga. I like natural goat’s milk soaps, and berry compote.

I enjoy these things, and LIBERALS DON’T GET TO TAKE THEM AWAY FROM ME.

Anyway… yes. I like yoga. Turns out that makes me a white supremacist.

WOOOPEEEE. Add that to the list, am I right?

According to Fox:

White people who do a downward-facing dog are contributing to a “system of power, privilege, and oppression,” according to a Michigan State University professor.

Ooomph. I’m already annoyed.

Shreena Gandhi, a religious studies professor at Michigan State, claims in an article she recently co-authored that Americans who practice yoga are contributing to white supremacy and promote the “yoga industrial complex.”

White Americans should learn yoga’s history, acknowledge the cultural appropriation they engage in and possibly reduce the cost of yoga classes for poor people, a group that often includes people of color and “recent immigrants, such as Indian women to whom this practice rightfully belongs,” Gandhi argued.

I just…can’t.

While we’re at it, PLEASE stop eating pizza, using boats, and using arabic numerals. These were originated in other cultures.

It used to be that sharing information and culture was a positive thing. Now people have their heads shoved too far up their own rectums to remember that modern civilization thrived when cultures began borrowing from each other…

but ANYWAY

She co-authored the piece titled “Yoga and the Roots of Cultural Appropriation,” with Lillie Wolff, a self-described “anti-racist white Jewish organizer, facilitator, and healer,” who has called for “decolonizing” yoga, the College Fix reported.

NEWSFLASH: They both suck.

The two argued “the explosion of yoga studios, yoga video, apps, yoga pants, and other yoga swag over the last two decades is evidence” of the “(mis)appropriation of yoga” that “is part of systemic racism” built on “the labor of black people and people of the global south.”

Um… White people didn’t invent yoga. Neither did black people. WTF is this?

“We would argue one of the goals of white supremacy is to buffer white people from the pain that comes from the process of exchanging cultural grounding for the unearned power and privilege of whiteness,” they wrote. “…this modern-day trend of cultural appropriation of yoga is a continuation of white supremacy and colonialism, maintaining the pattern of white people consuming the stuff of culture that is convenient and portable, while ignoring the well-being and liberation of Indian people.”

NO.

Gandhi and the Religious Studies Department at MSU did not respond to Fox News’ request for comment.

Gandhi said few white people “make the connection between their attraction to yoga and the cultural loss their ancestors and relatives experienced when they bought into white dominant culture in order to access resources,” Gandhi wrote.

But white people who twist their bodies in different yoga positions can do something about it, according to Gandhi.

“Given a deeper analysis of yoga, white yoga practitioners and teachers can engage in yoga in a decolonizing way that reduces harm and seeks greater cultural accountability,” she wrote.

“Especially during this time when the underbelly of capitalism — white supremacy, cisheteropatriarchy, and xenophobia – is being exposed, it is imperative that everyone, especially those who have access to spiritual practices like yoga, ask difficult questions of ourselves and one another,” the two concluded. “We must ask, in what ways are we complicit in a system that harms people of color, queer and trans people, poor people, people with disabilities, and immigrants?”

I’ve HAD IT.

OFFICIALLY.