
Last week I did some train travel, and something relatively simple happened that made me spiral into the depths of despair about the state of humanity.
But before I get into that, I need to explain two logistical points about traveling by train in England. First, to get from anywhere other than London to anywhere other than London, you’re most likely going to have to go through London. Second, there are ongoing train strikes in the country, so regular travel has been, in a word, borked.
This is why I ended up on the London Underground, or as it’s commonly referred to, the Tube. (If you want extra British points, call it the Tchube.)
As you can imagine, the Tube was busy, as it was Saturday evening and half the trains weren’t running. So when I boarded, it was onto a car with standing room only (and not much of it, at that). I maneuvered my suitcase to the corner, turned my back to the wall, and endeavored to make myself as compact as possible. As one does.
That’s when I realized a pregnant woman and her partner had boarded behind me. I had the following three thoughts, in this exact order:
Dear reader, no one did.
I stood on that train for five stops before someone alighted and she could finally sit down. With each passing minute my blood pressure increased as I contemplated shouting at the entire car, “IS NO ONE GOING TO OFFER THIS PREGNANT WOMAN THEIR SEAT?!” (I decided against it because I didn’t want to embarrass the poor woman and I’m not mean and scary-looking enough to intimidate a young man into standing without making a scene.)
I spent the rest of my commute fuming. Why did no one offer her their seat? I could think of three possible reasons:
Every single one of those is a grim condemnation of society. Are we so selfish and entitled that we believe our comfort is more important than someone else’s physical well-being? Are we so locked up in our digital worlds that we can’t see what is right in front of us? Are we so removed from biology that we can’t identify a pregnant individual by sight alone? WHAT HAPPENED TO US?!
I spiraled because most of the people sitting were young. They’re the future, and the future evidently has neither the sense nor decency to stand up so a pregnant woman can sit down. My in-laws commented that my experience is abnormal for the Underground; I hope they’re right, and that this was a car with an abnormal amount of self-absorbed people.
But I’m not sure I’d say I’m optimistic.
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4) Our victim culture has left most people not wanting to interact with others for fear of repercussions.
Even a good deed can be punished in our modern society by someone who has interpreted it as having negative intentions. This is true even if it’s a third party making the interpretation. Help a woman? You’re sexist for thinking she’s not a strong independent woman. If you’re could be the villain no matter what you do then it’s best to simply do nothing.
Many moons ago, I was at my 5-year high school reunion. I was sitting by a drunk classmate when one of the popular girls from our class walked by. (I did not know her as I always assumed none of the girls wanted anything to do with me, which was fine by me as it meant more beer for me.)
My classmate yelled to her and asked when she was due. She said very quietly that she was not pregnant. He then a little louder said when are you due? She again, but in a louder voice, informed him she was not pregnant. He then shouted at her, I said when are you due? Now with everyone at the reunion silently listening for her answer, she screamed at him I am not pregnant. I was laughing so hard I about fell off my chair. (Still, I got no dates for some reason. LOL)