Mini Lockdown Implemented In Wales. Good Luck Buying What You Need!

Picture yourself in Pontypool, Wales on the way to visit your Nain (Grammy Grams). You decide to pop in the local shop for her favorite tea, and a new pan because hers was looking right shabby. Maybe a jumper for the niece you haven’t been able to visit. Ah yes, 2020 hasn’t put a damper on your ability to look out for your family. There’s a spring in your step. But not a jaunty one, your mask prevents heavy breathing without feeling faint.

You open the door to the shop, and your eyes are hit with a sea of plastic. What daft c*nt put plastic all over the merchandise? Are masked shelves saving lives as well now?

No. The idiot you’re questioning is your government. The twp (stupid) government has decided that stores will not sell nonessential items, like your Nain’s new frying pan or the baby jumper. Now you’re pissed clean off, but that’s not even the whole of it. For the next 17 days all nonessential stores will be closed, as if businesses aren’t struggling enough.

In what has been referred to as a Firebreak Closure, from Friday October 23 to Monday November 9th, nonessentials will not be available in Wales. Northern Ireland has already instituted a similar “circuit breaker” lockdown. Boris Johnson’s spokeswoman (who is referred to a spokesperson, but she’s got boobs, so call me crazy but I’m going to call her a woman) said he’s rejecting pressure to implement the same measures in England. He “continues to believe that targeted local action in areas of high prevalence of the virus is the correct course of action.”

Maybe the fancy lockdown names are to keep people in high spirits so you don’t notice the government treating you like a straight up red-headed stepchild who can’t think for themselves. I’m sorry, you’ve decided which items are essential and which aren’t? Are you also handing out binkies and telling everyone to take a nappy-poo?

In true fashion of a nanny state, they’ve released criteria for traveling (only for a “reasonable cause”, whatever that means to the government), and meeting up with people from outside of your household (long story short, just don’t, unless you live alone, then maybe, but only with other people who also live alone). This is an addition to requirements for bars, restaurants, gyms, and schools to close completely, cease indoor gatherings and activities, and for stores to only sell you what they deem essential. Find a list here.

I know that Wales has the third highest rate of Covid cases in the UK, 182 per 100,000. I know that we would like to eradicate Coronavirus from the Earth. But. This is dumb. If it’s proven to work, I’ll eat my words. But the mini lockdowns haven’t worked anywhere else so, I feel pretty good about hardcore judging them for ignoring the social and economic impact of the pandemic with their made up regulations. It’s time to make some Welshcakes and put on your stretchy pants. Ya’ll are about to be home for a while.